Yeah, I am one of those people.
The ones that punctually love their birthdays when they are children and the ones that start to feel uncomfortable on their birthdays as teenagers and the ones that feel awkward but glad to celebrate near their 30s.
I remember I used to sing all the time. That was my main passion (and still is) and I remember I was the one who could put up a show, while other children where sitting next to me listening. I was the loudest. My birthdays were always celebrated and a lot of children were having fun.
Growing up, I encountered some issues and I have become the quietest in school. No one would hear my voice, if not asked for. Then, my birthdays became suddenly non existing and I wanted to disappear. But still they were nice as I have decided to not disappear and celebrate them with the few ones I loved. (my family)
In my teenager years, I had mixed emotions about my birthdays. Sometimes I was able to celebrate them with my friends and have lot of fun, sometimes I still just wanted to disappear and make it quick. I didn’t want to have yet another birthday, get older without getting happier. This was my view.
I am 29 today and I feel that I like my birthday. I am growing older, but wiser too. I feel like it’s okay sometimes to want to disappear, but also it’s okay to stay and celebrate with the few I love. In the end, to me it doesn’t matter if I didn’t have a big celebration party (I was never the one having those for some reason), it’s about to have the ones I love close to me. To feel happy and loved.
So, happy birthday to me!
Photos by theweirdycat